The day after

Today was odd. It was kind of like two or three different days smashed together.

In the morning, it was (mostly) business as usual. I went to work to clean up things and prepare for being gone for a couple of days. It is a bad time to be away, but then again there probably isn’t a great time. Luckily my co-workers are very helpful in this regard.

When I left, it was time to be with my family while we planned a funeral. We needed to meet with the rabbi and the funeral home. This was the first time I’d actually been part of the process. It was kind of surreal. Not an original statement, but accurate.

I can totally see how you can get suckered into buying a lot of things that you don’t actually need. There is a sales pitch that is calculated to make you feel guilty if you don’t buy things. I’m glad I wasn’t there when my grandmother died. This time we bought the same casket that she has, kind of a his & hers thing. If there wasn’t room for comparison I could totally see getting guilted into spending a lot more than we did. You feel guilt “cheaping out” on someone you loved.

After the arrangements were made, we all went back to my grandfather’s home in order to clean up and make space for the family visitation after the funeral. We decided it would be best to do it in his home rather than one of ours. It feels like he is there when we are surrounded by his things. More of that tomorrow.

The evening was mostly normal time with G & Ripley. And then to the hardest part… The Eulogy. I was asked to represent all of his grandchildren and deliver a eulogy. It is really, really hard to write one. Talk about a stressful speech. Summing up your 36 year relationship with someone that is that close to you. How do you even start on something like that? And to top it off, my grandfather was very good at speeches, so its not like there isn’t pressure to live up to his expectations.

I’ve managed a draft and I need to look at it again tomorrow. Hopefully, I won’t wake up and think that it sucks.

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